Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Touch Me Where It Hurts Lord

With endurance sports comes all kinds of aches and pains and sore muscles.  Sometimes, you just have to try to do something for them to relieve the pain.  One way I have found is to touch it where it hurts and bear down a bit.  Then, hold on and many times the pain diminishes; sometimes it goes away entirely.

Our lives get all kinds of aches and pains and sore spots.  Sometimes every move seems painful; so painful, we wonder if can we go  on.   And, like in endurance sports, we have to take just that next step, then another; we must keep moving forward, while asking God all the while, touch me where it hurts, Lord.  The pain often doesn't go completely away and the journey is still long, but sometimes there is a kind of healing in just knowing that God has touched me.  And, we know that His touch is a healing touch and we have been touched by the Master's hand.

Sunday, November 5, 2017

Is It Over?

And I want to do an ironman, to  put 140 + miles in one day on this leg?  Crazy. Seriously, it is hit or miss if I can make it to the bathroom when I first get out of bed.  The left leg often won't hold me up at first.  There has been a fall into my trainer bike in the middle of the night and many unsteady, painful times getting out of bed.    Really?  Can this be something God wants me do?  How can this be His purpose for me?  What is the benefit?   Most of the purpose, suffering, and training are done without notice of anyone: who can benefit except the orthopedic surgeon eventually? 
Face it.  You're fat, you're old, your uninteresting, and no one cares what you are doing with this or what you have to say through it.   Who is going to be impressed for the Glory of God by  an old sack of bones doing something insane?  It seems more like senility verification.  So what's the sense in the suffering?  Why do this anymore?  Is it over?

Age has beat me down to some extent, but  it has taught me this:  just about the time it really gets to looking ridiculous to the  human rationale: just about the time you are  about out of bullets, that is the point where God can move in more closely and do the work He has started in you.  When God shows up can't, ridiculous and impossible are all swept aside.  In the clear light of the only reality, God remains, standing in the gap, beckoning us on and through.

So, I choose not to believe that I can't do this because at times  I have trouble walking.  I choose to ignore the sounds of ridiculous for my age.  I choose to ignore the apparent impossibility of the huge task before  me  and that not many  my age attempt this stuff.  So I choose to live in the land of "nevertheless,"  where God wants me to "run the race that is set before me."

Use me God.  Show me how to  take who I  am, who I want to be, and what I can do, and use it for a purpose greater than myself

Martin Luther King

"I will lift my eyes to the mountains-where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth." Psalm 121:1-2

Monday, September 11, 2017


Scripture says, "For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day."

Outward abilities have never been present and time lessens them even more. Could it be that I am a little old for this? I don't know. Is the way it is supposed to go down when one reaches this time in life?

However, if I am to be pulled down, and if I am to obey the "suppose to" as prescribed for my age by conventional wisdom, then what I am I going do with this fire that still burns inside? What am I going to do with the fire God put there, the fire that He seems to fan to flame higher every time I consider following "supposed to" off into the night. In the presence of the flame God gave me, I must "faint not" and wait upon, depend upon the renewal that God gives.
"And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice. And it was so, when Elijah heard it that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out and stood in the entering in the of the cave.----" So I wait for that "still small voice." "-----And behold there came a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here Elijah (Marvin)?"
I Kings 19:12-13

Monday, August 21, 2017

Be Still

Times I feel His presence so intently, so intimately, that it is like He is in the room alongside me or looking over my shoulder. Be still and know that I am God." Be still to know God is with me. The way to God seem one of stillness; stillness of the world within us like when Jesus calmed the storm, still the troubled waters of our minds and clear the lens to see God, to experience God more clearly and more dearly; Be Still.

"Be still and know that I am God
: -----" Psalm 46:10

Time races on; life hurries by, but god doesn't . His stillness spans the ages; the same yesterday, today, and forever. Only we change for better or for worse. We get closer or farther away. We wanted closer but we work toward farther away. Working against ourselves and against communion, and relationship with God. Be still.

Be still and know that the decision wasn't obvious. There was never an answer "yes." But each time I decided to "not" do the event, it didn't feel right. It was as if God was not going to open a door or make a path for me with a shout and a blinking sign saying "go here." No, He was going to whisper in a still small voice, a voice I could only hear if I still myself, humbled myself to stillness, that I might be close and intimate to hear, to be inspired and follow the will of God. Perhaps that place with Him is what a large part of the journey is all about anyway: a stillness of self; a closeness with God.

Tuesday, May 30, 2017


I Peter 8:15 Hope

We are recognized by our hope. We have hope in a hopeless world. And the world’s wonders, “how can that be?” Are you insane? Haven’t you heard the news? Only a fool would have hope in today’s world. But today’s world is not different than yesterday’s world. There were no “good old days.” For all have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God – even those from the “good old days.” In our time and in the times before, there is, and has not been any hope in this world aside from Jesus Christ. A phrase from a song say, “my only Hope, God’s only Son. I do believe----"

Saturday, May 27, 2017

Sense of Gratitude

Looking through all my records here on my computer this afternoon. In a moment of enlightened awareness, it came to me: I have been so blessed. These records and writings of my experiences assimilate into a sense of gratitude: What a great life I have had! I told my wife of my realization, of my gratitude of the wonderful things I have had opportunity for. I thanked her for being a big part of my access into a life will lived. But, I know; keenly aware, that God has been in and through it all. Blessed by God to a life I am grateful for and expectation and hope for the one He has yet to reveal. I would imagine I will be even more grateful and grateful to Jesus for what He did that I might have that life and have it abundantly.

Saturday, February 11, 2017

A Violet Person

This time of the year the violets push through the leaves of the forest floor and send forth a small, beautiful, fragile-looking flower as a herald to the certainty of spring. My mother loved violets. This time of the year she would like to walk the woods and trails seeking them out to become excited when she found one of the little blue flowers. When she got where she could not walk so well, I took her violet-looking and she loved it still in a childlike way.
I was never sure why she loved the violets so much – I should have asked – but I can guess. For one, they are some of the first flowers of spring, blooming in the face of cold weather yet to come. Another is that violets push their way through leaves and debris on the forest flower to forge a place in the sun; a place to bloom at last in defiance of winter, and its surroundings. It seems it is determined to share its beauty in spite of it all.

Mother was like that. Mother was like that violet. In spite of all the pain I have seen her bear, somehow she could always manage a smile. In spite of her confinement and deprivation in nursing homes, she always had a good word for the staff and her visitors. Her smile was what everyone remembers; just like the beauty of the violet, struggling to smile in spite of all holding it down, in spite of wintery weather yet to come. God help me be a violet person for Your Glory.